i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I don't think brook has ever known best
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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