Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
