Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
