3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize