I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
