Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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