What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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