you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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