Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize
