these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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