its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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