and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize