doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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