do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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