its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
