Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
