I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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