So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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