you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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