We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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