You work out of a Hotel?
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
