i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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