The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
