what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
