im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
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