he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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