You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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