She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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