I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
