i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I got inside last night via doggy door
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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