omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
