so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.