For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
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