That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Randomize
