last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
