There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize