you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
