maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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