I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
You dont lie about slip and slides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize