Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
