Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
