Already got asked if we're dating
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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