Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
