how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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