Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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