Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I cannot find my penis.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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