Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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