First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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