plz talk dirty to me
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
