HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
