He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
